Chemo CYCLE 2 - May 14 - June 9, 2010

Cycle 2 has been easier than Cycle 1, overall. As my body got used to Chemotherapy, it didn't react as poorly as it did in Cycle 1. The symptoms were reduced, the nausea lessened, but my pain increased for a few days. It was also a more tiring Cycle. I was very tired the first 8 days and always wanted to nap or sleep. I was drowsy and weak, but thanks to my Chemo experience, I was able to circumvent a few miserable moments.

The pain got us worried though, as it was the same pain from before starting the first cycle of Chemo. This implied that the tumor didn't respond to Chemo, and that it was gaining ground. I felt the tumor breathing again, pulsating on my flank and just simply coming back to life. This pain would be most vibrant at night, emphasizing it is doing well and not bothered by the chemicals that are flowing through my body. I slept an average of 3 hours a night for 3 nights. It was miserable as my lower back pain was also present. It was during these nights that I was up at 4am answering emails ;)

We decided not to make any assumptions about this pain until we get results back from the Post-Cycle 2 PETScan, which will take place on June 2nd, 2010. Results should be out a few days later. We are praying very hard for the Lord to grace us with good results. He is able to do it easily, and I trust his healing hand is as present as the pain is.

On Day 12 (May 25) of this cycle, a memorable, unforgettable, Oscar-worthy nosebleed came to pass at around 5pm. My nose bled for over 35 minutes...

I decided to rough it up the first 10 minutes and get over my problem alone. As I laid on my bed with my head leaned back, I couldn't imagine more blood dropping as I was pinching hard the napkins over my nose. However, this thing was a machine. The rate at which the blood was dripping combined with the blood I was swallowing eventually left me with a pale, fearful face. I called my sister for help (parents were out for an hour) and she brought me ice that I put on my nose. The ice didn't seem to help initially. I will not disclose or describe the nasty bloody stuff that came out of my nose as part of this blog's censoring. Joanne made some calls and was told that due to the low platelets in my blood, I was very vulnerable to various types of bleedings, thus the current one that we were in the midst of. After 20 minutes, and after literally freezing my nose, the blood stopped leaking. I was so relieved and just imagined this thing going on for an hour. I know it could have been possible just feeling its momentum inside of me. I woke up the next morning with a bruised nose! For the next 3 days, It felt like my nose was punched.

To divert a bit from health-related issues, I am going to include a few short, yet fun stories that happened in the last couple of weeks.

1) My dad wrote the prosecutor a letter explaining to him that I was newly diagnosed and that due to my Chemo, I wouldn't be able to go to court to defend my speeding ticket. Miraculously, 10 days later, the prosecutor calls my dad, expresses sympathy and regret for my situation and says that "Justice has been done in the case of Daniel Haddad". He said that while such letters never arrive at his desk (and he still doesn't know how it did), the state of Texas thinks Daniel received proper justice and that the speeding ticket will be dismissed.

A week later, I receive a letter with a dismissed speeding ticket! Can you believe this story? The prosecutor was really kind and understanding. He ended his phone call with "Many prosecutors still have a heart!"

This man extended grace to me even though he doesn't know me. He took the time to call us and to fill out the paperwork to 'nullify' the ticket even though he didn't have to. This is a good example reminding us to have forgiving hearts at ALL times, as we have been forgiven too, by Christ on the cross. While forgiving an enemy or a person we dislike extremely is possibly the most difficult thing we can do, it is the biblical and right thing to do.

When I am faced with such a situation, I remember this verse and take strength from it:

Ephesians 4: 32
"And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you"

I owed one to my dad -- I would have never thought of writing such a letter. He saved me money, a defensive driving class and time! :)

2) on Day 4 of my Chemo, my dad was stopped for speeding. We were headed to the hospital.

I was fully dressed in scrubs, with wires flowing from my chest to the Chemo backpack. I had my mask on, and looked very tired, yellow and sick.

As soon as the cop approached my father (I was on the same side of the car), the officer looks at me and asks me if we were headed to the hospital. He diverts his conversation to me. I quickly explain to him what's going on with respect to the blood test and the dressing change for my catheter that I needed to do at MDA. We were late to the appointments that day. He then looks at my father and tells him that because we have an emergency, he is going to let us go.

This officer, also, extended grace to us and was kind enough to not want to add misery to our current situation.

I love to see men and women with forgiving and graceful hearts always helping and sympathizing those in need. Everyone had to have been in both situations. Do you recall when someone forgave you? And how did you use that freebie when you had the upper hand in a situation?
We all mess up, and so have I. Practice makes perfect. They say once a person does something 21 times, it becomes a habit. Let's make it a habit.

While my illness does not give my dad the liberty to go 11 miles over the speed limit, I was happy he was let go because now, him and I were even. He saved me from a speeding ticket, and so did I ;)

3) One of my dearest friends (let's call him Ray) lives and works on an American Base abroad. The dad of another friend went to that same base for a project, as a contractor. He went there not too long ago. Ironically, both of these friends met not knowing they both know me. When Ray met him and knew that he was a Christian believer, he asked him to pray for me. The conversation went something like this:

Ray: I'd like you to pray for my dear friend who has been sick for a while now...

The father: Sure....what's wrong with your friend?

Ray: He was diagnosed with Cancer about 6 weeks ago and I'd really like for you to pray for him...

The father: I would love to, but is this friend Daniel Haddad?

Ray: Oh my goodness! Yes!!! You know him too???

The father: Yes, I do...and as a matter of fact, I have been praying for him for over a month now!!!

This story is true and very touching. Not only did these 2 friends meet in the most random place ever, but what touched me most was my dear friend Ray, who was asking all believers and friends around him to pray for me. He is so loving, and was worried about me for weeks after he heard the news and was still making a big deal when it came to prayer. His faith in God is huge -- it lead him to believe that the more people prayed for me, the more God would be inclined to listen and answer the prayer. He has faith that God only can heal!

Additionally, Im sure he did this knowing that I wouldn't find out. He did it out of his own good heart, and because he knows that all believers are united, and pray to the same God -- who is our biggest physician.

The other thing to notice is that my friend Ray had just met this gentleman! It's not like they were friends from a long time ago...this is what makes this story all the more memorable to me. He was sharing his story to a complete stranger -- but to a stranger who is his brother in Christ, thus breaking the ice through that union and making him feel at peace to ask such a request.

I am in awe of this story and very thankful and blessed to have such wonderful people in my life.

Philippians 4:6-7

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

This same peace invaded my heart the very first night when I found out about my illness. I knelt and prayed to God and asked him to forgive me from all my sins and that I would trust Him, follow Him and hope in Him throughout my journey. It's unfortunate that man is much more yielding and obedient when hard times come his way -- but it's better than being foolish and only relying on oneself or on worldly resources to heal him. God gave me peace that night that I will never forget, and this verse took a new meaning to me.

4) While meeting various patients at MDA and conversing with them, many mentioned the "Red Devil" Chemo. They asked me if I was taking it, and I wasn't sure as I hadn't heard that term before.

Laying in bed getting Chemo on my 2nd day of this cycle, I asked my nurse if I was getting "Red Devil." She looked at me and smiled and told me "No, you are getting the Blood of Christ." I was amazed at such a neat and encouraging response. They call it "Red Devil" because it's RED and because it's the toughest and most brutal Chemo out there. I never made the analogy that this RED Chemo was being injected into my body to heal me, as did the Blood of Christ on the Cross and through His suffering. I LOVED her response and thought of His blood every time I looked at the Red fluids flowing through the wire. It made me smile. God was with me at all times, even physically ;)

As opposed to Cycle 1, I had "Blood of Christ" Chemo for over 72 hours straight....Tough, Uncomfortable and Unyielding, Im glad this cycle is over...

Those were the 4 stories I gathered from this cycle...

On Days 17 through 21, I felt an extreme chest pain. I couldn't breathe normally, and it prevented me from sleeping a full night's sleep on Day 20. We were told to go to the ER, but since I did a PETScan on Day 20, we decided to wait for the results as that would show everything...I also did a Chest X-Ray on Day 19, and the results of that showed that my heart and lungs were clear.

I don't know what this pain is, but it feels like I just sprinted for a mile and then stopped. The problem is the pain is on my left chest, on the side of the heart. I feel my heart aching, and the whole left side affected. Since the pain has been around for more than a day or 2, my nurse wasn't sure it was another Chemo symptom. I will inform my doctor when I meet with him soon.

As for now, I am taking more faith in the Lord and hoping and knowing that He has things in control.

I did my PETScan on Day 20 of this cycle - June 2, 2010 at 8am. It went much better than the first one. As I said before, when I know what to expect, things are easier...Aside from the new, novice nurse who gave me a painful IV, the process went well; the 2 hours went by smoothly. While getting injected with contrast and waiting for it to flow through my body, I wasn't able to sleep again -- I had a full hour to do so, but my mind was too busy running at 100mph.

We are anxiously awaiting the results of the PETScan as things can swing either way for me.

Whether the tumor responds to Chemo or not is a totally different game for me. We would have to decrease/increase Chemo cycles, resort to surgery or radiation or to a different Chemo mix...There are many options available, but none would be sure or guaranteed if my tumor didn't respond to Chemo. My doctor, Dr. Patel, who is world renown in the Sarcoma world, thinks that I may need 6 cycles to shrink my tumor.

On Day 19, I told my brother that I wouldn't be surprised if God performed a miracle and shrunk it within 2 cycles or at the most 4 cycles. God is at work in my life and I feel His presence at every step of the way. He is able. My brother liked my faith!

The results of the PETScan will obviously dictate when Cycle 3 starts. We are waiting to hear from MD Anderson.

God is alive! PETScan results!

I met with my doctor on June 9th to get the results...Obviously Cycle 2 was way past due, but I got to enjoy an extra week in decent health. To our joy, we were told the tumor shrunk by 62%!! It has now become the size of a Golf ball, roughly. While the results are astonishing, it was a huge miracle, no doubt. I give full credit to God.

We now knew the tumor responded to Chemo, which is a feat in itself as most Sarcomas don't respond to Chemo. The shrinking was also beyond what anyone had imagined....the doctor himself thought it was unusual. Amazing, isnt it? It really is. It's simple to overlook this miracle and just move on...but, as for me, I've dwelled on its importance and on His saving grace. This is the power of the God I serve. Praise God.

Psalms 20: 7-8

"Some trust in chariots, and some in horses, but we trust in the name of the Lord our God. They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm."

With these results, I expected my Jail time to be reduced by a few months....but it turns out my doctor and MDA think that I still need to do the full cycles and stick to the plan, as the body has floating cancer cells, and we need to get rid of the "weeds" which might want to linger around the bone/soft tissue even if the tumor is taken out. This was pretty disappointing because I wasn't ready to go through so many cycles of heavy-duty Chemo.

The plan is 6 cycles of Chemo, followed by an operation and then another 2 or so cycles of Chemo...Oh boy...

Here are some pictures from this past cycle:

I will never forget Cycle 2, Day 1. Colette and Grace surprised me and my parents. As we were getting off the elevator, we saw them there waiting for us! It was a beautiful surprise! They spent most of the day with me. We took photos, had some food and just spent quality time together. My day flew by. Listening to Colette and seeing how strong her faith is (through her experiences and accomplishments) really pushed me to the limit. Day 1 was gone!

Other days in the hospital...

The soda of this cycle definitely goes to Ginger Ale and Crush!....